By Sharon (SD) Mac After I pulled out of Buc-ee’s, the road opened wide in front of me… one of those long Texas stretches that feels like it goes on forever. The kind that forces you to think. The kind that doesn’t let you hide. The kind where God starts speaking, because He finally…
By Sharon (SD) Mac Of course my first stop had to be Buc-ee’s. It wasn’t planned, but nothing about this journey really was. The minute I saw that giant smiling beaver on the billboard, my heart tightened and softened at the same time. Buc-ee’s wasn’t just a gas station for me and Steve. It…
By Sharon (SD) Mac Once I left the neighborhood and merged onto the highway, the world suddenly felt too big and too quiet at the same time. Cars passed me. Billboards blurred by. The sky stretched open like a canvas God painted just for that morning. But inside the car, everything was still. Heavy.…
By Sharon (SD) Mac The morning I left, the house was too quiet. The kind of quiet that feels heavy like the walls themselves know what’s happening. I stood in the doorway for a long moment, keys in one hand, my water bottle in the other, trying to steady my breathing. It wasn’t fear…
By Sharon (SD) Mac Packing for a trip is one thing. Packing for a calling… is a completely different kind of weight. I remember staring at my suitcase on the floor… empty, wide open, almost mocking me. I stood there thinking, “Where do I even begin?” What do you pack when you’re not traveling…
By Sharon (SD) Mac There comes a point in grief when you’re not better, you’re not healed, you’re not whole… but you’re awake. Something inside you opens… not fully, not loudly, but enough for you to sense that the season of only surviving is coming to an end. That’s what happened to me. One…
By Sharon (SD) Mac Healing didn’t come to me in some big moment or revelation. There was no dramatic sunrise, no sudden breakthrough, no instant peace washing over me. That would’ve been easier. Cleaner. More poetic. But the truth is… God is still healing me the way He often heals His children: in small…
By Sharon (SD) Mac For as long as I was with Steve, I worked. And when I wasn’t working, I was caring for him. Serving him. Helping him. Supporting him. Loving him the best way I knew how. That was my rhythm. My normal. My life. My calling as his wife. And I wouldn’t…
By Sharon (SD) Mac The morning after the ER visit, I woke up feeling like I had been hit by a wave I never saw coming. My head was pounding. My body felt heavy. My soul felt numb. Everything inside me wanted to stay in that chair…to curl up, cry, and disappear for a…
By Sharon (SD) Mac A few days after Steve’s funeral, after the girls hugged me goodbye and I dropped them off at the airport. I drove home to an empty house. And I mean empty in a way I had never felt before. The dogs were quiet. Too quiet. They looked at me, then…